There are some cliché, romantic sceneros that play out really nice in books or on film, but in reality they just aren't sexy or romantic.  Here are some that I can think of., can you think of anymore?

• Sex on the Beach or on the Ground - Nothing says lovin' like a bum full of sand. OUCH! Plus, the towel that you so thoughtfully placed on the ground before your romantic interlude has since bunched up and / or moved out of the point of action.  If you're in the woods, twigs poking you in the back isn't sexy and your lover isn't the only one tasting and sucking on you. Mosquitoes and ants want in on the action, too.

• Sex in the Shower -  Well, somebody always ends up getting the shaft, (and not in the good way) in this scenario.  One person gets the nice warm water and the other person is stuck shivering in the cold end. Those shivers aren't tremors of desire, they are the onset of possible hypothermia.

• Drinking Champagne from Your Lover's Shoe - All I can say is, eww! Plus it ruins the shoe!

• A Quickie in the Janitor's Closet or Any Closet - Sometimes those closet shelves are not so sturdy. When one falls it really kills the mood.  Also, when you accidently knock over an open can of Old Dutch Cleanser it burns your eyes and nose and it seems like you can never stop sneezing.

Some things are truly better left to fantasy.