Is anyone else as fed up with “reality t.v.” as I am?  I mean does anyone write a SCRIPT for a television series anymore?  Of course the industry says that there is a big market out there for reality television, but I think the bigger market is the advantage of not having to hire and pay actors or anyone else for that matter to produce a show. 

            Fox is notorious for having the most ridiculous reality t.v. shows ever produced.  Remember “The Littlest Groom”?  What about, “Playing it Straight”?  Their latest shameful endeavor is “Who’s Your Daddy?”  a reality show in which woman who is looking for her birth father has to guess which of the eight men is her real father.  How demented is this?  What about those guys playing the fake fathers?  How could someone pretend to be someone’s father when they know this young woman has to be desperate as hell to go on a reality show to find him? 

If the television networks want to produce real reality TV, here are a few suggestions I had for some shows:

SURVIVOR: SOUTH CENTRAL L.A.  – Why drop contestants off at exotic locales to test their survival skills? In this show contestants will be left in the middle of South Central L.A. in the dead of night with no money, no food, no transportation and no weapons.  They will have to try to get housing and food stamps with each challenge and try to not get their electricity turned off. The winner never has to set foot in South Central L.A. again.

HELL JUNIOR HIGH – Have you ever gotten pissed off at the fact that teachers work half a year, get winter and spring break and still get paid in the summer?  Have you ever complained about how the school system is substandard and they children are being held to lower standards? Well, this show is for you.  Contestants must teach the entire year at an undisclosed junior high school.  They are allowed to teach a subject that they are comfortable with, but they must adhere to state requirements in regards to making daily and yearly lesson plans, maintaining a proper grade book, attending staff develop meetings and meeting with parents. In order for the contestants to win, all of their students must pass the state required standardized test. The winner gets a teachers salary.

WHO WANTS TO BE MY MISTRESS?  -- One rich married Texas oilman is looking for a young, preferably buxom woman between the ages of 18 - 27 to fill those lonely nights.  His wife Nadine is getting older, (she’s 41) and she just doesn’t understand his needs.  The lucky winner will receive all of the benefits of a mistress – money, jewels, luxury cars and plastic surgery.  The catch?  Nadine is the president of the Women’s Riffle Association and has an addiction to Xanax and booze.

If any of these get picked up (I’m sure Fox will be interested), I’d better get a percentage of the profits.  All of my fellow bloggers can vouch for me when I say these were my ideas first.